Many people have anger issues but only some of them can really see it. Others don’t think it is a problem, even though it may be. It can be a really frustrating thing to deal with. It can also be very difficult to deal with or even overcome. Yet, it is possible.
Having anger issues can be due to any number of reasons. It may be a side effect of a medication. It could be for some reason that’s deep within you that you just cannot identify. People who were once easygoing and carefree may find that they have anger problems later on in life. To try and manage these problems, let’s take a look at some helpful tips to help you manage your anger.
1. Think, Then Speak
Easier said than done, but just like most things, it takes work and practice. Many people with anger problems say things in the heat of the moment, only to regret it later. Try to make a conscious habit of gathering your thoughts first, then say something. Do not just blurt out something, as this can be hurtful to someone else. It could also make a situation escalate. If anyone else happens to be involved in that particular situation, allow them to do the same thing too.
2. Express Anger When Calm
Once you calm down, then express your anger or frustration in a way that is non-confrontational but assertive. When you are calmer, you can think clearly, which will allow you to clearly get your thoughts and feelings across. This way, you won’t really hurt someone or even try to control them.
When people are stressed, they can get angry, upset and snap. By getting proper exercise, a person can reduce their stress. If you ever notice that your anger is brewing, try to go for a walk, a run or do some other physical activity that you enjoy. Exercise helps release endorphins which helps you feel better.
4. The “I” Statement
Though it is difficult in the heat of the moment, try not to criticize or place blame. This can make things escalate. When talking, use “I” statements. This can help the situation if you are also specific about the issue, yet remain respectful. As an example, you could say, “I’m upset that you did not offer to help me with the housework” instead of saying “You never do any work at all.”
5. Calm Down & Be Forgiving
Try not to hold grudges. Something happens, deal with it and move on. Let it go. Be forgiving, as this can be pretty powerful. If not, things will be growing inside you as you get bitter and feel there is no justice. However, in order for you and the other person to learn and grow, you need to be forgiving to the person who made you angry.
6. Develop Relaxation Skills
Practice relaxation so that when you get angry, put it in use. You can do deep breathing, take up yoga or repeat a calming phrase in your mind.
If you have tried some of these methods and still feel you have not made any progress, it is not such a bad idea to seek professional help. Getting psychotherapy can work wonders and it can also help prevent hurting others or yourself in the future.